Conversations of the recent past

Over this summer I have gotten to know someone who was in the Lebanese Forces in the late 80's, early 90's, before the "Hakim" got arrested ... to my friends who I have already mentioned him to, he is my "LF buddy" ... Over the span of these 3 months, we have had quite interesting conversations, which have started out with my instinctual attribution of the stereotypical LF traits to him. And I was pleasantly proven to be wrong. I know he had fought in the war, especially from a recent conversation when he gave specific details from the War of Elimination against Aoun. Here are some of the things that he said ...

"You know, I was there. Now I know that I should have acted differently, but at that time, I was in university outside Lebanon, and I came back halfway through my degree. I thought I would be coming back to my country, to fight for something good, and, well, I was wild. I wasn't serious about my studies. So I came back, and we fought, and we fought for the hakim, we fought for our ideals, but now I know they were stupid ideals, everyone else had their ideals, and we fought because we just thought ours were better. But what happened? My friends died. Alot of people died. For nothing. Now I know that what happened shouldn't have happened. And I wish it didn't. That is why at the time we accepted the Taef. What was the alternative. To fight with Aoun? For more people to die?"

"I was arrested several times by the Syrians. After the war, they were my enemies. They were the ones who directly affected my lives. I remember this one time, when I was a child, and when the Syrian tanks were near, we once went up at night and painted the LF cross on the tanks ... those were the times when we had fun. But it got serious later. After the war, I was involved with politics. Trying to make Lebanon better. Trying to help everyone accept each other. But the Syrians were affecting Lebanese economy, and we were against that. So we got arrested. And at those times, the hakim would actually hand himself over, telling them to take him and to let us all go. He wasn't like the rest, he cared about us ..."

"The Israelis did attack this country. And the south has been greatly affected. And I am very happy they left. But I found that the syrians were the ones affecting the Lebanese economy the most. They were sucking our blood dry. And I feel sorry for the syrian people. I used to work in Syria for several years, and I saw how they lived. I saw how they were treated by their government."

"You know, money isn't anything. My father told me that many times. We were pretty well off, and then during the war, we lost everything. But my father said that it is much harder to become the man you want to be than to have the money you want to have. You can easily make alot of money. But to become a good man ... "

"I left Lebanon because I just couldn't take it. I would work, and they would send me the check a month later, with only half the amount they had told me they would pay. Once, only once, I tried to take it to court, but I spent more money than what I had lost, and nothing came out of it. Why would I go back now? I don't like the life here, I would prefer to live in Lebanon, but we need money to live. There is no judiciary. There was this company in (I forget the name of the place he said) that was the biggest factory being built in Lebanon. And there was some stupid political factor that prevented it from being opened. What did the owner do? He didn't put up with it and just moved. That is why businesses don't open there. We need to make it easier, more transparent."

"What do you want me to tell you. I worked with muslims. I know that they are like us, they work, they are decent. I didn't care that they were muslim, they didn't care that I was christian. But then some stupid leader comes up and says something sectarian, and we all cluster."

posted by Lazarus, 4:36 PM